Blind Drunk Justice, Season Finale, Part 1 of 1

Posted in Blind Drunk Justice on December 20th, 2010 by bl1y

Here it is folks, in all of its heavy-handedly edited glory, the final episode of this season of Blind Drunk Justice.  What?  The internet has seasons?  Yes.  It has…um…Spring, and Summer, and Vacation.

Blind Drunk Justice, Episode 15

And here’s some links for you:

Nom nom nom your way to the unemployment line.

Law firms hate the Little Mermaid.

Smile and die.

Law firms are hiring, they’re just not hiring you.

Oh Tannebaum.

Blind Drunk Justice, Episode 14

Posted in Blind Drunk Justice on December 10th, 2010 by bl1y

Duh-nuh-nuh-nuhhhh, duh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuhhhh, DUH-nuh-nuh-nuhhh, duh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuhhhhh, Duh-nuh-nuh-nuhhhh, duh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuhhhh, DUH-nuh-nuh-nuhhh, duh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuhhh-nuh-nuh-nuhhh-nuh-nuh-Nuh-Nuh-Nunuh-Nuhhhh, Nuh-Nuhhh-Nunuh-Nuhhh!!!!!

It’s the penultimate countdown!

Or in the common parlance, the second to last episode of the season.

Blind Drunk Justice, Episode 14

We got some good stuff this week:

Lawyers in trouble for having their pants on the ground, Non-lawyers in trouble for the same thing, A judge ordering moderation in fury (but not abstinence, of course), and a blogger once again attempting to explain that doc review is not legal work.

Also, if you promise not to make any DP jokes, here’s two polls for you!

How long does BL1Y have to wait until he can safely spend the extra unemployment check?

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Would you get better legal training as a:

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Blind Drunk Justice, Episode 13

Posted in Blind Drunk Justice on December 3rd, 2010 by bl1y

I know it’s only been two weeks, but it feels like forever. Here we are again with another raging good episode of everyone’s favorite legal humor podcast.

Blind Drunk Justice, Episode 13

This week we discuss Why the Rabbi Crossed the Road, the fact that you Can’t Handle the Ruth, whether You’ll Get Dinged for reading Wikileaks, and how some jerkoff got nominated for the ABA Blawg 100.

This week’s puzzler (combining math and fitness to be super scary to lawyers) is a little complicated, and so you don’t have to try to figure out my drunk explanation, here it is:

You have an adjustable free weight (dumbbell). It’s basically a handle, and you put disk-shaped weights on either end to adjust it to the amount that you want.  The bar/handle weighs 2.5 lbs.  You have 5 disks for either side.

What is the maximum amount of weight you can put on the handle such that you can also adjust it to every 2.5 bl increment below that number?

If you think you figured it out, e-mail your answer to BlindDrunkJustice@gmail.com, and if you’re right, Namby will steal your answer and try to claim he finally figured one of these things out.

Also, there’s no trick with the fact that you put weights on both sides.  You have two sets of 5 disks, the sets are identical, and you have to evenly distribute weight on either end. So, for this question, just pretend you have 5 weights and ignore this detail.

Bling Drunk Justice, Episode 12

Posted in Blind Drunk Justice on November 19th, 2010 by bl1y

If you’re tryin’ to fade me then you must smoke crack,

Oh yeah, podcastin’ like that uhn heart attack.

Blind Drunk Justice, Episode 12

As a special treat this week, I’ve condensed all of the source material for the stories we discuss in to one convenient Super Link.

And yeah, I know the player is still a bitch glitchy. Try the download button (right click + save link as).

Blind Drunk Justice, Episode 11

Posted in Blind Drunk Justice on November 12th, 2010 by bl1y

You know you want it, you know we got it, so let’s not beat around the bush here:

Blind Drunk Justice, Episode 11

[If it doesn't play, just use the download button. And, if you know of a more reliable WordPress plugin for playing mp3s, leave a comment down below.]

In this episode we discuss kissing baby genitals, the journal of law and justics,the po-po getting their props-props, and quatro crazy.

Next week in honor of the upcoming Black Friday, we will be discussing good (and bad) gifts for attorneys.  If you have suggestions for what to get, or what to not get, e-mail them to blinddrunkjustice@gmail.com.  Don’t post it in the comments, because then we won’t have anything new to discuss, will we?

Also, here’s the story that I ended up cutting because the discussion was kinda lame and the show was running too long anyways.

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Blind Drunk Attention Crash, Episode 2

Posted in Blind Drunk Justice on November 5th, 2010 by bl1y

This week Namby Pamby is sick so there won’t be a new Blind Drunk Justice, but we are comin’atcha with another episode of Blind Drunk Attention Crash, or AC/BD if you’re in the camp of Ben Corman OF AttentionCrash.net.  This show was actually recorded back before Halloween, but of course with being out of town, and then drunk, and then recovering from being drunk, and then recording the last BDJ, I’m only just now finishing this one.

Check it out, should be moderately enjoyable. In this episode, Ben and I discuss tornadoes, whether we’d rather be House or Wilson, who we’d go gay for, and why people can’t get fired for just plain sucking at their job.

AC/BD Episode 2

And as a special treat, he’s Ben’s comedy routine:

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Blind Drunk Justice, Episode 10

Posted in Blind Drunk Justice on November 1st, 2010 by bl1y

Sorry for the delay everyone, but among going out of town, Halloween, and watching some awesome, amazing football, this latest BDJ episode is getting to you a little late.  …In spite of having recorded it early.  But, as a special treat/annoyance, this episode features a scary Halloween remix of our theme music.  Hope you enjoy.  And, if you don’t, whatever, no one cares.

Blind Drunk Justice, Episode 10

For those of you following along, here’s the picture of Tucker Max being served process in North Carolina that we discussed:

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Blind Drunk Justice, Unattractive Nuisance Edition

Posted in Blind Drunk Justice on October 25th, 2010 by bl1y

Some of you may have noticed a certain lack of a blind drunk judiciary last Friday.  Let me explain.  Last week Philadelphia Lawyer wrote a post discussing the different types of drunk various alcohols will make you.  I disagreed with his assessment (it’s in the comments).  He claimed that beer produces a slow, stupid drunk, and so to test this theory, I got royally shithoused on Yuengling.

Okay, so you might be thinking Yuengling, sure it’s a pretty decent beer taste wise, but it’s only 4.4% ABV.  How do you get shithoused on that?  Simple.  First, start drinking early in the day, to raise your baseline blood alcohol content from 0.00 to somewhere closer to 0.03-0.04.  This is called a “running start.”  Then, when the time is right, you just move to regular fast-paced drinking.  At that point you will be 100% prepared to record the worst podcast I’ve ever suffered through editing.

I woke up Friday with possibly the worst hangover I’ve ever had, and as such didn’t get a lot of editing done.  Then, of course, Saturday and Sunday are reserved for watching football, so I didn’t get a lot done then either.  That brings us to this morning, when the final, god-awful, don’t-say-I-didn’t-warn-you, seriously-please-don’t-bother-listening-to-this version was edited, music was added, tracks were mixed down to two channels, exported to mp3 format and uploaded to the internets.

Seriously, “unattractive nuisance” doesn’t even begin to describe this shit storm.

Blind Drunk Justice, Episode 9

And faaantastic… While previewing this post to make sure everything was working …it’s not.  The audio plug in I use was “updated” twice over the weekend, so of course it’s not working.  If it doesn’t play, just right click on “Download,” select “Save Link As,” and you can just listen to it on whatever media player you use.

Blind Drunk Attention Crash, Episode 1

Posted in Blind Drunk Justice on October 18th, 2010 by bl1y

Check it out children, in an effort to further secure my domination of the podosphere, this weekend I teamed up with Ben Corman of AttentionCrash.net, and famed host of Attention Crash Radio, to bring you our first crossover show, Blind Drunk Attention Crash for the Team BL1Y folks, or AC/BD for Team Corman.

In our first episode we discuss History Channel hiring practices, Bill O’Reilly v. The View, Brooklyn Space Program v. The View From 100,000 Feet, private space flight, the fact that I can get by just fine sitting in silence, and also that I’m likely to have a drink anyways to cope with it.

Blind Drunk Attention Crash, Episode 1

Here’s a video of ol’ Fuckface:

And a more inspiring video from the point of view of an amateur space probe:

And, in case you forget the recipe for the official show drink, the Perfect Nothing, here you go:

1.5 oz sweet vermouth
1.5 oz dry vermouth
Serve over ice

Also, you can serve it in our distinct Team BL1Y or Team Corman styles:

Team BL1Y: Add a generous dash of bitters.

Team Corman: Add a Dorito garnish.

Finally, I’m sure this drink has some more well established name, if you know it, feel free to hit up the comments and let me know.

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Blind Drunk Justice, Episode 8

Posted in Blind Drunk Justice on October 15th, 2010 by bl1y

Well children, it’s time once again for another episode of Blind Drunk Justice.

Blinder, Drunker, Episoder Eightier

There’s a couple of groundskeeping matters on the new puzzler, so I’ll clear those things up.  Steely McShitlaw’s cell phone apparently can only tell time if it’s getting a signal from a cell phone tower, it doesn’t have an internal clock.  And, he’s doing paper doc review, not electronic doc review, and as such he doesn’t have a computer down there in Subbasement C.

And of course, some links to the shit we try to have an intelligent conversation about:

We said we’d talk about the attorney billing $3,500 an hour, but I spared you listening to the horror than ensued.

Are we drowning in a sea of legislation?

And of course, the History Channel is no place for a woman, unless you really believe women are from Venus and were brought to Peru on spaceships thousands of years ago.  Sorry, Discover Channel is better, Boomdeeyada mother fuckers!

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