Dos and Don’ts of V-Day Gifts for Lawyers

Posted in Uncategorized on February 9th, 2010 by bl1y

VSHave a special lawyer in your life that you’re going to be spending Valentine’s Day with? Then head over to BitterLawyer.com and read my article discussing what you should (and shouldn’t) give as a V-Day gift.

Lingerie is out.

NSFW photos are in.

You can read my other articles posted on BitterLawyer here.

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Reason Not to Go to Law School #30

Posted in Reasons Not to Go to Law School on February 5th, 2010 by bl1y

You’re expected to tip your professors.

That’s right, after giving professors your money through tuition, buying $130 books full of cases you can get for free online, and then buying study guides to learn the stuff your professor decided your tuition dollars didn’t cover, you’re expected to give your professor and end-of-the-semester gift.

Here’s the e-mail I got about it at the end of my first semester, sent from the girl we elected our SBA representative:

Subject: End-of-semester business

It’s a long-standing tradition at the law school that each 1L section present its professors with two gifts (one gag gift and one real gift) and a large card signed by all students on the last day of each class. Though I’d rather not have to, I have the extreme (dis)pleasure of having to collect money from all of you to purchase the gifts for our four Section 1 profs.  The SBA recommended donation is $5 from each student.  I know it’s the end of the semester and loan money is running low, but it’s only $5 to thank our profs for putting up with our photoshopping, game-playing, Google-talking, email-checking, online-shopping, AIMing-during-class BS.  So, tomorrow before class, during the breaks, and after class I will be taking your money.

Also, I’m accepting ideas for gifts.  The gag gifts should somehow relate to each professor.  Furthermore, since I don’t have Neuborne, I’ll need a little extra help with this one.

See you in the AM.
- Deb

The SBA, one of the most useless student organizations in the history of useless student organizations, actually has a recommended donation?  Let’s do a little quick math.  Each section my year had 110 students in it.  110 x $5 = $550.  Not counting our small Lawyering sections, we had 4 professors (each section was subdivided into two Civil Procedure subsections with different professors).  $550 / 4 = $137.50.  That’s more than the bonus I got my first year as an attorney.

And what did the professors do to earn this?  We know it wasn’t teaching the material in an interesting or efficient manner.  No, apparently we’re supposed to pay the professors extra money because they’re so boring that doing anything else online is more interesting than listening to a lecture we paid thousands of dollars to hear.

What a crock of shit.

Reason Not to go to Law School #30(a): You have to put up with bitches like Deb who think professors deserve extra money because they suck so hard at their incredibly easy, overpaid jobs.

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